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May 9, 2005

Should I Poison My Co-Workers?

From time to time in life, we are faced with these great existential questions. Should I join the Three Hundred? (Answer: Yes!) Should I use half-salt instead of salt? (Answer: Yes!) Should I tell that random passer-by that it is not yet Memorial Day, so white shoes are inappropriate? (Answer: No, even though it's true.)

Today I am dealing with an age old question. Should I poison my co-workers?

Now don't pick up the phone and call 911 to alert the Philadelphia police that a tiny red-headed murderess is on the loose. I'm not talking about slipping arsenic into everyone's happy hour cocktails.

No, I'm debating whether or not to buy them chocolate.

Before I left my old/new job, I used to keep a candy jar on my conference table stocked with fancy Lindt truffles. My co-workers would file into my office after lunch for their little treats. I had all varieties, and I enjoyed handing out little bites of pleasure. I also considered it an effective tool for managing their moods. A little sugar and caffeine in the afternoon and everyone is happy. The chocolate is perfectly safe from me because I'm not a chocolate person... while I like a bit of it occasionally, I'm not drawn to it, so in all the time that I had chocolate on my desk, I never ate one of the Lindt truffles. I did eat a Halloween snack sized Butterfinger once, but that's another story...

Anyway, I was always the supplier of chocolates, but I haven't gotten any since I came back. And you know what? I may not.

Even though it's just a needle in the haystack of gak that some of my co-workers eat (you know who you are and who you aren't) I still feel somewhat guilty contributing to a high calorie, high sugar, high saturated fat lifestyle.

I felt very good about myself when I passed out my megamuffins, and the gang really, really scarfed them down. I know they'd love brownies too... several of them have been allowed to try the sacred brownie, and it went over quite well.

I just don't think I can do it. Buy the chocolates, that is. I love my co-workers too much to poison them. I want them to live as long and healthy as possible.

Maybe I could teach them to file in after lunch and take little spoonfuls of Essential Mix?

Here's the crunch for yesterday. A nice, boring Sunday. Mom and I did our Mothers' Day on Saturday -- an outing to a gorgeous estate with amazing gardens and a mushroom outlet -- so don't freak out and think I didn't do something for my mom. She had a nice trip, lunch out (and wow did I have an awesome glass of pinot noir!), mushrooms, and then this morning I brought her flowers, the Sunday times, and her coffee, complete with nonfat milk and two Sweet and Lows.

Food List : 5-08-05.FLS
DATE : 05/08/05
Num. Foods : 18
Food #1 : Egg, white, raw, fresh 1 cup
Food #2 : Oil, vegetable, flax 2 teaspoons
Food #3 : Grape juice, frozen concentrate, sweetened, undiluted, with added vitamin C 1.5 oz
Food #4 : Kale, raw 100 g
Food #5 : Arugula, raw 50 g
Food #6 : Salsa, med. chunky 2 tablespoons
Food #7 : Yogurt, plain, skim milk, 13 grams protein per 8 ounce 1 cup
Food #8 : Coffee, brewed, prepared with distilled water two grandes
Food #9 : Lewis Labs 2 tablespoons
Food #10 : Soup, chicken broth cubes, dehydrated, prepared with water 1 cup
Food #11 : Broccoli, frozen, chopped, cooked, boiled, drained, without salt 25 cals
Food #12 : Cauliflower, frozen, cooked, boiled, drained, without salt 25 cals
Food #13 : Carrots, frozen, cooked, boiled, drained, without salt 25 cals
Food #14 : Olives, ripe, canned (jumbo-super colossal) 8 olives
Food #15 : Alcoholic beverage, wine, table, red 6 oz
Food #16 : Calcium chewy 20 cals
Food #17 : Olive oil 2 teaspoons
Food #18 : Mollusks, clam, mixed species, canned, drained solids 30 g

NUTRIENT TOTALS:

Abs. Values %RDA/SA

Calories 964.00__cal 48%
Protein 78.73__gm 143% RDA
Total Fat 26.55__gm 41%
Sat. Fat 7.24__gm 36%
Mono. Fat 11.37__gm 39%
Poly. Fat 5.55__gm 83%
Carbohydrate 77.87__gm 26%
Fiber 20.80__gm 69%
Cholesterol 64.92__mg 22%
Vit. A 24693.70__IU 494% RDA
Vit. B6 0.96__mg 60% RDA
Vit. B12 30.91__mcg 1546% RDA
Vit. C 239.23__mg 399% RDA
Vit. E 7.73__mg 97% RDA
Thiamine 1.26__mg 114% RDA
Folacin 250.97__mcg 139% RDA
Riboflavin 3.07__mg 236% RDA
Niacin 12.62__mg 84% RDA
Panto. Acid 2.36__mg 47% SA
Calcium 982.11__mg 82% RDA
Copper 0.99__mg 49% SA
Iron 18.02__mg 120% RDA
Magnesium 232.52__mg 83% RDA
Manganese 3.49__mg 116% SA
Phosphorus 512.67__mg 43% RDA
Potassium 3228.18__mg 161% RDA
Selenium 139.14__mcg 253% RDA
Sodium 2481.77__mg 103% SA
Zinc 5.11__mg 43% RDA
Tyrosine 3.84__gm 400% RDA
Lysine 8.10__gm 1125% RDA
Phenylalanine 5.11__gm 532% RDA
Leucine 9.04__gm 942% RDA
Valine 6.26__gm 746% RDA
Methionine 2.94__gm 980% RDA
Cystine 1.70__gm 566% RDA
Tryptophan 1.39__gm 772% RDA
Threonine 4.83__gm 1006% RDA
Isoleucine 5.60__gm 778% RDA

Breakfast: eggwhites and flax oil

Lunch: kale and arugula salad with flax oil, topped with 1 cup plain non-fat yogurt
salsa and balsamic vinegar

Dinner: Lewis Labs brewers yeast soup with broccoli, cauliflower and carrots
and 30 g canned clams, plus 2 teaspoons olive oil
8 olives
glass of wine

grape juice to wash down morning creatine, calcium chewy to keep my bones healthy and cute.

P:C:F = 33:43:24.

Not Zone perfect, but I've come a long way, baby.

Posted by april at May 9, 2005 3:20 PM

Comments

No truffles!!! How about some almonds? Fresh strawberries? Even chocolate could be okay - http://www.lasiembra.com/home.htm - buy some nice organic fair trade semisweet chocolate. It has lots of minerals and antioxidants.

I put a bar out on the counter at work the other day - broken into those little chunks - and it was gone very quickly.

Posted by: Mary at May 9, 2005 12:22 PM

My $0.02: you're doing the right thing. Not poisoning your coworkers is good for the soul/good karma/just plain good.

One thing you might consider is to put little mental puzzles or games of dexterity in your office instead of food. I have one co-worker who used to have all kinds of food in his office...then he went on Atkins.

He still has a jar of peanuts (boring), but now he has this addictive toy where you have to get a golf ball on a tee. The catch is that the ball and tee are inside a glass bulb filled with water, making the ball really hard to control.

Maybe that's not the best example. It's a little too frustrating for most people--and the persevering ones may never leave your office :) But hopefully you get the idea.

Hope that helps,

-Dan

Posted by: Dan at May 9, 2005 12:41 PM

Mushroom outlet? I'm not sure that the idea of last year's mushrooms, even at a steep discount, is that appealing. Or is it not that kind of outlet? ;)

Posted by: James at May 9, 2005 1:25 PM

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