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November 25, 2006
Mustard In The Airport, Etc.
I like mustard on my savory megamuffins (yes, I will post the recipes ASAP, and I apologize to my loyal readers who are waiting for the recipes while I fail to post them! It requires retyping the whole thing, you see, as there are many changes.) My savory muffins are smaller than MR's, and they are made with corn, peas, tomatoes, broccoli, and peppers plus savory spices like cumin, cayenne, paprika and garlic. Oh, and a whole bottle of Whole Foods Organic Hot Sauce per 24 muffin batch. So my muffins go well with mustard, nonfat cheese, or hot sauce.
Megamuffins, as we all know, are the ideal road food. With 10% of the RDA of every essential nutrient per 100 calories, they fit into a ziplock bag and are ready for you when you're ready for them. For lunch today in the airport, MR packed my megamuffin and my salad.
First I ate the salad while sipping a glass of chardonnay at the airport bar (I am a big believer in airport bars... I have met some of the most fascinating people in them, and I attempt to grace the bar in whatever airport I visit. It's just that these days, on CR, I have one glass of wine vs. the pre-CR habit of having more than one vodka cranberry.) My father is a United Methodist minister, and one of his church members had given him a giant bag of homegrown turnip greens that MR and I ate up like we were iguanas. I savored every spicy green in my salad, which went perfectly with a glass of chardonnay, and waited until we were at the gate to eat my megamuffin.
Our flight was delayed. I decided to go hunting for mustard.
Never mind that I had a few packets of emergency mustard stored in my Hello Kitty backpack (that was one of my two year anniversary presents from MR.) I wanted fresh mustard.
I found one restaurant where the waitress had no problem with me lifiting a few packets of Grey Poupon from the condiment counter. But I really wanted to find a pretzel kiosk that would have mustard in a pump. No such luck. Finally, I stopped into a bar/Carolina bbq restaurant that had mustard, ketchup and Tabasco on every table. While no one was paying attention, I unwrapped my muffin, took some mustard from the table, poured it on the muffin, replaced the mustard container, and left.
Ordinarily, I am a very good kid. I have never been stopped for speeding. I have only gotten two parking tickets in my entire life, and neither of them were my fault. I cross the street at crosswalks more than your average person. I wear my seatbelt and throw fits at my best friend when he turns on red. But when it comes to mustard, I am a thief.
The mustard is for all! Or so I tell myself. Why should people who buy cheesesteaks be the only ones to benefit from the free flowing spicy mustard? Why should I support the pretzel economy in order to have a squirt on my megamuffin?
Here are the top three places where I take mustard that arguably does not belong to me:
1. PA Turnpike stops
2. Airports
3. Conference hotels where little leftover glass jars of Grey Poupon liter empty conference rooms.
No one wanted the mustard. No one will love the mustard like I do. It was just sitting there, all lonely and yellow. How could I resist?
I enjoyed my megamuffin, with both yellow mustard and Grey Poupon.
We finally caught our plane, which was about two hours late, and by the time we got home it was about an hour after when we like to have dinner. I threw together a dinner in ten minutes for MR: organic frozen Trader Joe's veggies, garlic, veggie broth, eggwhites for protein, olive oil, baked apples with cinnamon and hazelnuts on the side. Pinot noir. I had so little time that I fell back on eating a South Beach Breakfast wrap (200 cals) with flax oil (40) and hot sauce (0), with a side of Laughing Cow light cheese (35 cals, lots of calcium) on the side. Pinot noir. Not exactly my typical veggie-filled, low cal meal, but even CR girls occasionally get home late after a delayed flight and want to throw something quick in the microwave. Better a protein filled wrap with flax oil and calicum loaded lowfat cheese than ordering a pizza... and I trust that there will be veggies in my life tomorrow.
We had a wonderful Thanksgiving, and I'm happy to be home. The cats howled a lot at first (never mind that I have a cat sitter come to play with them while we're gone... they want mommy!) but now Kieffer is sitting under the dining room table with his paws in the air rejoicing in the presence of all his humans.
Thanks to all my wonderful commenters! We live in a weird world, don't we? Genocide in Africa, war in the middle East, people without health insurance at home, and yet there are people who devote energy to picking on those of us who consume fewer calories. What can you do?
Enjoy your life, put mustard on your megamuffin, work at making the world a better place in whatever sphere you find yourself. In the end, we have no one to blame but ourselves for the choices we make about our health. I'm pretty happy with mine. Hope you are happy with yours too.
Posted by april at November 25, 2006 9:04 PM
Comments
April, I too have spent many hours on the search for mustard in public places! As my band will spend weeks on the road at a time, and I occasionally forget to bring my own condiments and I am left to do the mustard search. I believe that it should be free to any and all who seek it. Lots of love, Amanda in DC
Posted by: Amanda at November 26, 2006 6:10 PM